Thursday, 6 June 2013

Volunteering at a hospital Trichotillomania Emotions

So the other day I went volunteering at a hospital in a children's mental ward. Some seem very happy to see me, some seemed so lost, and some were just really really anxious. I played plant vs zombies, table tennis, wii, made sandwiches, solved 1000 piece puzzles with most of them. Some of them were having a great time always smiling, whilst others were constantly looking at the ground. The nurse even got them to talk about their feelings if they wanted to. There was this one particular girl that I felt really sorry for, her name was Sarah. She was 16 years of age and has this rare disorder called Trichotillomania. Its a disorder where you are constantly pulling your hair out and have no control over it. She describes it as if its like an addiction, how she is always fiddling with her hair pulling it off. Sometimes she even goes crazy with it, pulling it out frantically saying that it gives her some relief when she is really sad, down or stressed. But its an ever lasting cycle pulling out her hair is like a coping mechanism then, only to make her feel more depressed later on. She has so many bald patches that she has to shave her had off. People around her are always saying 'Why are you doing this to yourself ' ' You are so stupid get some control over your life' ' Do you have cancer or something?' ' You know your only making yourself uglier right ' ' Stop being an attention seeker ! ' She told me that there was many times when she felt like committing suicide, the only thing I could tell her is that the pain her parents will have to endure for the rest of their lives if she committed the act, how precious life is, and the wonderful things to experience in life when you get the chance to. I told her about the thousands of refugees out there that have to go through many hardships and excruciating pain at times to escape persecution and find a better way of life because to them life is precious.   She also told me how she really wanted a boyfriend. I just told her that in life whenever we feeling really down, we always want to have a partner to fill that void. But if your in a relationship were and you unhappy with yourself, don't accept who you, that as a result is going to have an adverse affect on the relationship. I hope I told her the right thing.

We go through a roller coaster of emotions every day. Our moods are constantly changing from time to time. We could be both happy and sad for no reason. At times we could look in the mirror and say darn I look good today, others days you could feel discontent about how you look. Some days we hate the life we are living, other days you feel lucky to have the life you have.  Before I thought you could control your emotions, but I’m starting to realize that emotions arise subjectively without you making a conscious effort.

Let say someone insulted you and you feel your blood pressure rise. For a minute, as your body floods with resentment, your chance of staying calm is slim. You take a deep breath. Turning away expressionless, you muster all the spiritual benevolence you can, and for once you don't counter-attack. You say something impressively forgiving and dignified.
Hard do you eh, I guess it just comes down to how you interpret and respond to the situation,  your emotions control you when you assume there's only one way to react, but you always have a choice. Make the right one.
Sometimes though its due to the negative core beliefs about oneself. There are people who think of themselves not highly enough. Their self-esteem is essentially in the gutter, and their emotions are the result of not being able to love themselves adequately.

Sometimes you just have to change your perspective on life. 

The guide to 'How to not give a fuck'

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